爱的涟漪系列（42）：“让爱回家”探索原生家庭工作坊心得

今天的心情只能说一句：感恩。


去年6月份刚办完”从原生家庭走出来的自己“，和卿菁约了再办一场给她和一些朋友，就这样一拖就拖到一年后的6月份，我们终于可以一起学习。从中有些原本能够出席的朋友却无法赴约，有的人刚好因缘具足，没有特意安排或朋友鼓励之下，我们就促成2天的生命旅程。

还有那么用心准备好的各种各样的美味有营养的午餐，让大家觉得好幸福哟！

当我答应卿菁和清妹的时候，内心就出现了这一句“让爱回家”。

让我们从心认识我们自己的成长旅程，让大家把“爱”从新定义，把生命看得更真实和广大。

尝到一个个生命从无助中尝试找到生存的价值和决定，而深深地烙印在孩子们的心灵某个角落。以为隐藏或者逃避就一切可以从来，发现越不去面对和看清一切，才是带给我们不清不楚的人生，爱就很难回家。不清不楚的生命，只能不断地讨好、指责、理性对待或者打岔，而忘了自己还有一股一致性的爱。

这一班善友太棒了！大家对自己和他人的尊重和信任，让我们一起度过每一天的9小时生命旅程，拿起勇气面对自己的一切，给以彼此的鼓励和支持。让我从心看待我的生命，唤醒我常会沉睡的心。

Virginia Satir 写于关于“我”

In all the world, there is no one else exactly like me. There are people who have some parts like me but no one adds up exactly like me. Therefore, everything that comes out of me is authentically mine because I alone choose it. I own everything about me- my body, including everything it does; my mind, including all my thoughts and ideas; my eyes, including the images of all they behold; my feelings, whatever they might be -- anger, joy, frustration, love, disappointment, excitement; my mouth and all the words that come out of it -- polite, sweet and rough, correct or incorrect; my voice, loud and soft; all my actions, whether they be to others or myself. I own my fantasies, my dreams, my hopes, my fears. I own my triumphs and successes, and all my failures and mistakes. Because I own all of me, I can become intimately aquainted with me. By doing so, I can love me and be friendly with me in all my parts. I can then make it possible for all of me to work in my best interests. I know that there are aspects about myself that puzzle me, and other aspects that I do not know. But as long as I am friendly and loving to myself, I can courageously and hopefully look for the solutions to the puzzles and for to find out more about me. However I look and sound, whatever I say and do, and whatever I think and feel at a given moment in time is me. This is authentic and represents where I am at that moment in time. When I review later how I looked and sounded, what I said and did, and how I thought and felt, some parts may turn out to be unfitting, and keep that which proved fitting, and invent something new for that which I discarded. I can see, hear, feel, think, say and do. I have the tools to survive, to be close to others, to be productive, to make sense and order out of the world of people and things outside of me. I own me and therefore I can engineer me. I am me and I am okay. 当一切源自我可以选择时，我就能改变去看待我的过去、未来和现在。问题不是问题，如何面对问题才是问题。这也是她给以我们看待生命的正面导向。 曾经有一则故事也相当对我很深刻的影响：

灌溉者引水，箭匠矯直弓箭，
木匠處理木材，而智者調御自己。

　　磐踶它是舍衛城一位著名人物的兒子。他在非常年輕時，就出家為沙彌。出家後的的第八天，他與舍利弗一齊去化緣，在半路上看見農人引水入農田，他問舍利弗：
　　「尊者！沒有心識的水，能夠隨人意地被導引到任何地方嗎？」
　　「是啊！水可以被導引至任何地方。」舍利弗說。

　　然後他們繼續上路。後來，磐踶它又看見製作弓箭的人用火鍛燒弓箭，使其筆直。他也看見木匠切割、鉋平樹木，用來做車輪。這時候，磐踶它內心如是思惟：「如果沒有心識的水可以任人導引至任何地方；沒有心識且彎曲的竹子可以撫直；沒有心識的木材也可以做成有用的東西。那麼，擁有心識的我，為什麼無法控制我的內心，修行清淨止觀呢？」

　　經過這番思考後，他當下向舍利弗請求回精舍自己的房間，並深刻觀身。諸天神也使精舍和周遭環境保持寧靜，協助他禪修。不久，就證得三果。

　　就在這時候，舍利弗正朝磐踶它的房間走去。佛陀透過神通知道磐踶它已證得三果，只要繼續禪修下去，馬上就可證得阿羅漢果，所以佛陀決定要阻止舍利弗進入磐踶它的房間。佛陀就走到磐踶它的房門口，詢問舍利弗一些問題，使他無法進入房間。磐踶它才能證得阿羅漢果，這天正是他出家的第八天。

　　佛佗說：「當一個人精進修行時，甚至天神們都會來護持，我個人就親自在門口阻止舍利弗進入磐踶它的房間，如此，磐踶它才能證得阿羅漢果。」

谢谢您们，让我的生命变得不一样。

Love You Beary Much....

熊妈妈